Primal Rage

primalragetitleWhen a newly envisioned kind of video game gets invented and people like it, what do developers do? Ape it, naturally.

Enter Primal Rage. If you’ve never heard of it, don’t worry. It appears to have been lost to history. But it cashed in on not only the fighting game fad of the first half of the 1990s, but also the advent of gory games (Today, it’s less common for a non-mobile game to not be bloody). And although I never liked it that much, it was a success.

But rationally speaking, was it that good? Not really. It was a niche title that thrived on gore and dinosaurs. But once the novelty wore off, it was a mediocre title.

Plot: 7 out of 10

The concept is dinosaurs (and a couple orangutang versions of King Kong) battling it out. Do you expect a script worthy of Citizen Kane?


J.R.R. Tolkien should sue.

Actually, though, there is a plot in the manuals and endings. In a post-apocalyptic future, gods have appeared. These gods are the dinosaurs of this game. Basically, these are good and evil beasts fighting to see who rules the world.

I really don’t see the need for a story. Not only is it stupid, dinosaurs fighting each other are what was really intended to attract people to Primal Rage. And hey, it works! People don’t play fighting games for story anyway.

Graphics: 7 out of 10

This is a representative of the brief era of digitized graphics. How does it do? The animations are fantastic… at first. When you punch or kick, the animation isn’t nearly as well done. The proportions become less believable.

Sound: 8 out of 10

As this game is about dinosaurs betting the shit out of each other, the music is of a wilderness nature. Quaint wording, eh? It is fitting and generally has a catchy beat. Not quite festive enough at times, though.

A purple sky makes this game even more delightfully ridiculous!

A purple sky makes this game even more delightfully ridiculous!

Gameplay: 5 out of 10

So far, I’ve been positive, right? Well, this is one of those games that fail where they most need to succeed. The gameplay is pretty plain. Other than death moves upon beating an opponent ripped from Mortal Kombat, there’s not much to separate this game from other fighters. Just the same old punch/kick/jumping attack/special move formula as in most of the others. No better, no worse.


You know, can pick up and either eat or throw these people in the background at your opponent. Class act.

Challenge: 3 out of 10

This is definitely better to play with a friend. Because the computer opponent is extremely cheap. Not tough, but cheap. Jump kicking, punching two or three times upon touching down, and repeating are your best friends. Attempting sound strategy will get you beat fast! It’s embarrassing to even type that…


Mortal Kombat ripoff or not, death moves like the fall Sauron takes in the background feel real good!

Overall: 5 out of 10

It’s no wonder that nobody remembers Primal Rage. It’s too mediocre to be memorable. As I said before, it thrives on the dinosaur theme. There’s not much else here.


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